This article explains what is evasive behaviour and how you can get out of it.
Understanding Evasive Behaviour
You are in the midst of a difficult and unpleasant task. You take out your mobile, and before you know it, you’ve spent 20 minutes on social networks.
On another occasion, a painful memory comes to mind, and in that moment, you turn on the TV.
One afternoon, you feel a restlessness, a restlessness in your heart, and you decide that the best remedy is a night out with your friends.
If you have been in a situation similar to these, it is likely that you have entered the labyrinth of evasion.
The Reality You Intended To Leave Comes Back
It’s easy to get in. All you need is a situation, a memory, or a feeling you’d like to avoid. It is an attractive labyrinth. It promises fun, entertainment, and relief, things that we all definitely want to have in our lives. But this labyrinth is illusory. Even if you wanted to stay in it, the relief soon fades and you are trapped in the reality you intended to leave behind.
Seeking Distraction Is Ok In The Short Term
It is important to note that seeking distractions in difficult times is the most human, and often can be something positive for our welfare. It becomes problematic when, not wanting to face our reality, we always look for an escape. If we do not devote time and energy to address that unpleasant thing that we experience, it will continue to present itself ever more intensely.
Getting Out Of The Evasion Labyrinth
1. Listen To Yourself , When You Face Your Feelings, They Lose Some Power
Overcoming this labyrinth requires some insight on our part. Instead of fleeing towards this labyrinth at the first instance of discomfort, it is necessary to stop and pay attention to our thoughts, emotions, and motivations. What is it that I feel? What am I thinking? What do I want to do? By asking these questions, we manage to name our situation, and dispel the darkness in which we might find ourselves. Sadness, pain, fear, anxiety: easy feelings to feel, but difficult to name or accept. But when we do, that is, when we come face to face with them, they lose some of their power.
2. Introspect In Prayer
For the Christian, this process of introspection, of discernment, is never done alone. It is done with a God who looks at us with love, who knows us completely, and wants to help us to know ourselves to face any difficulty, get out of the labyrinth, and thus live our reality with the love that he gives us.
Jesus cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out.” The man who had died came out, his hands and feet bound with linen strips, and his face wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go” (John 11: 43-44)
Based on the original Spanish text written by: Ulises Covarrubias, sj
Translated by: Fr Jimmy Bonnici
Published: August 2019