Different versions of Jesus

Through the centuries we have seen several representations of Jesus which were modelled more on those who came up with them than on the authentic Jesus. This usually happens when an aspect of the Gospel is taken out of context and is magnified beyond all proportion while other aspects are ignored.

Thus, the more legalistic and conservative have created a Jesus who is primarily a teacher of morality and a judge, the more liberal endorse an image of Jesus who is mostly meek and forgiving. The hippie movement created a Jesus who attacked the establishment and was an insurrectionist but who wanted to change the world through the spreading of love. Left wingers state that Jesus was the first socialist and recently, with the rise of the New Age Movement, we have seen him depicted as yet another enlightened teacher among many. Elements of truth are present in all these representations but by taking one aspect to an extreme at the detriment of all other aspects, we risk creating a caricature which distorts rather than sheds light on the identity of Jesus.

Jesus in the Gospel

Every Christian is called to discover who is Jesus and the truths that he imparts. This quest is a lifelong endeavour and the ultimate answer will only be achieved in the beatific vision in the hereafter. A good place to start this journey is in the Gospels. Some aspects of Jesus and his teachings may come as a surprise to us because they contradict the other versions of Jesus described in the introduction which have become more familiar to our society than the Jesus of the Gospels.

Jesus, the presence of God with us

Early on in Matthew’s Gospel (Mt 3-4), Jesus is manifesting his mission. Although he is sinless, he is baptised in the Jordan with the sinners and although he needs no purification, he goes out into the desert. The desert in the Bible is a place where one is purified. Although Jesus is the Son of God, he is tested by Satan. Already it is evident that the mission of Jesus is to restore the horizontality between God and Man that was lost in the Garden of Eden. Jesus, the Immanuel, walks among us as God walked with Adam in the Garden. Jesus is the presence of God woven into the very fibres of our human existence. He is with us in the existential reality of our innermost fears, our sins, our illness, our failures and ultimately in death.

Jesus, the giver of the law of love

Right after these events (Mt 5-7), Jesus is portrayed as the new law-giver. Like Moses, he is standing on a mountain, teaching the crowd about the way of righteousness. He is not the abolisher of the Old Law but the one who is bringing it to its fulfilment. Jesus turns the orientation from the outward keeping of the Law to an inner alignment with the spirit of the Law (Mt 15, 7-8). The Law is founded on the love of God and love of the other (Mk 12, 29; Jn 15, 12-15, Mt 25, 31-46). It is what brings about the Kingdom of God which starts quietly from within but spreads and transforms the world (Mt 13).

Jesus, the saviour of the oppressed

In the Gospel of Luke, Jesus is portrayed first and foremost as the Saviour. As soon as we hear the word Saviour we immediately think that He saved us from sin. However in Luke Jesus is introduced at the beginning of His ministry (Lk 4, 16) as the One prophesied by Isaiah who was going ‘to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free’. Jesus’ mission is not simply a legal transaction that cancels our sins through the shedding of His blood, as has often been portrayed. It is a holistic salvific plan through which He enters into our existential reality and transforms it. This transformation occurs in our tangible, everyday reality and does not merely happen on a spiritual level. We do not just become holy but we become happy and fulfilled on all levels of our existence.

Jesus, doctor of sinners

But we can reject Him just as He was rejected in Nazareth (Lk 4, 28-29). This rejection is a new way of looking at sin. Until then, Jewish society used to regard sin as breaking the Law of Moses. Public sinners like prostitutes and tax collectors were regarded as impure and the pious were duty bound to ostracise them. Jesus considers sinners as sick people in need of a physician. Thus, He spends much time in their company in order to bring them Salvation (Lk 5, 30-32). He distinguishes another group of people whom He does not justify so easily. These are those who reject Him. These are already condemned (Jn 3, 18). The sins of sinners are a result of their wounds which keep them enslaved but the evil has embraced darkness because it gratifies them and hides their evil deeds (Jn 3, 20).

Going back to our introduction, we can ask ourselves, is Jesus more of a judge or is He infinitely merciful and forgiving? Is He maybe somewhere in the middle of this spectrum?

This question itself with which many still struggle says more about us than about Jesus. Our fallen nature creates a divide between justice and mercy. Many in the Church are also split along these two factions. We attribute this bipolarity which is exclusively ours to God and by extension to Jesus. In order to come to terms with this dilemma, we conclude that God (and Jesus) is both a judge and all merciful. He is somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. He first forgave the adulteress but then He ordered her to sin no more (Jn 8, 11). I could almost imagine Jesus wagging his finger at her like any self -respecting school master.

Jesus, healer of the heart

Since Jesus considered sinners to be sick and in need of a doctor, he would never simply admonish the woman caught in adultery to ‘sin no more’. He would take authority over her spiritual illness and order her to be well like he did innumerable times with physical illness and even death. ‘Sin no more’ is therefore equivalent to ‘Get up! Pick up your mat and walk’ (Jn 5, 1-18) and ‘Lazarus, come forth!’ (Jn 11, 43). He is not admonishing her, He is healing her. If the adulteress being a sinner was indeed ‘sick’, it would have been ridiculous to expect her to stop sinning through her sole efforts. It would have been as ridiculous as expecting the crippled man to walk and Lazarus to rise through their own powers.

This dilemma that we find ourselves in is stemming from legalism. It focuses on sin. Is God going to judge my sin or is He going to close an eye and forgive it? This perspective is fuelled by fear. The more conservative are afraid that others will exploit God’s mercy and fall recklessly into a sinful life. The liberal ones are uncomfortable with the idea of a judging God because they know that ultimately they fall short. So in order to exorcise that fear, they depict God as lenient and compliant.

In reality this complex has nothing to do with God. God (and Jesus) transcends this tug of war. These two schools of thought struggle to understand what Jesus will do with our sin; will He condemn it (and us) or will He forgive it (and us)? In the process of asking ourselves these anxious questions the Good News is being obscured if not altogether lost.

Jesus, giver of life in abundance

What Jesus did with our sin is that He took it on Himself. He penetrated into our very own individual, existential Hell and from there He rose and we rose with Him. Those who accept Him and are willing to leave their comfort zone (Mt 16, 24) go through that same passage from death to life and are given life in abundance (Jn 10, 10).

In our endeavour to understand who Jesus is let us contemplate some phrases that Jesus Himself used to describe Himself:

“I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” (John 6:35)

“I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12)

“Very truly I tell you, I am the gate for the sheep.” (John 10:7)

“I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die.” (John 11:25)

“You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am.” (John 13:12-13)

“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6)

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener.” (John 15:1)

Read more:
– The Difference Jesus Makes in My Life
– Top Popes’ Quotes About Following Jesus Christ

The post Who is Jesus? appeared first on Universe of Faith.

In the Christian conversion “God comes to meet me”

A spiritual conversion experience happens through God’s initiative and in His own time. In paganism and all other religions, it is man who is expected to do something in order to become worthy of the favour of god or the gods. You quest until you find god. In Christianity, God comes to meet me and finds me where I am because He has compassion for me (Ex 3:7-8). So then, I don’t need to search? I can just stay passive and let God do the work?

“I did not go through the rebellious teens”

This is not a conversion story where the protagonist goes from being a bad person to becoming a good person. Although such stories strike our imagination I find them too legalistic and not always relatable. I was considered to be a good person, even an exemplary one. I didn’t even go through the usual rebellious teens. In my teens I became a member of a religious community which was rather, let us say, intense. I studied the Bible and partook of the Sacraments regularly. I also tried to be kind and help others. My sufferings, which were manifold, since I was ill with severe Fibromylagia and Myalgic Encephalopathy, I considered to be my cross and I offered it all for the needs of the world. I was also deeply unhappy.

“After my father’s death I became angry at God and became the worst version of myself”

When I had almost hit thirty, my father passed away. The rest of my family and friends supported me for about two weeks. For the rest I was alone with my illness and grief. That is where I realised that all the people in my life where at best indifferent towards me and at worst abusive. I had no job. No hobbies. I only had a religion which did nothing for my real problems. This realisation came after four months of Dad’s passing. I became angry at a God whom I thought I had loved all my life and had allowed my life to become a shambles. After a year of this I became the worst version of myself. Suffice it to say that I was no longer considered exemplary and I was peremptorily kicked out of the community. My new lifestyle, which I had intended to be the solution to my woes, dragged me deeper and deeper into despair until one day I said to myself, “This is exactly what hell is like. I have arrived in hell. I had been stripped bare of all my securities and I was vulnerable and alone facing my deep existential misery.

“We spend a lot of time trying to escape our inside pain”

We all carry the pain of our ‘woundedness’ inside. We all have deep fears, a sense of failure and loneliness buried deep inside us. We spend a lot of time and resources trying to escape from this pain or at least striving to numb it. We use religion to do that, we use drugs, money, family, the list goes on..We try to project an image which is the exact opposite of what there is inside. We want to convince others just how happy and successful we are. We think that if others see us in this light and give us their approval, we can be free from the pain and fear gnawing on the inside. Hence the phenomenal success of Facebook. We don’t do this because we are bad or evil but because we are in pain and afraid. At times, however, there comes a crisis like the one I just shared, which brings to the surface all our hidden wounds. It is like a window God opens onto our psyche where He shows us what there really is inside. It is like Jesus making mud with his spittle and the stinking dust of the street at the time and smearing with it the eyes of the beggar man born blind (Jn 9). This man was living a life of misery. His life depended on the charity of others, (much like those of us whose self-esteem depends on the likes we receive on Facebook) and he didn’t know any other life. This was his normality, his comfort zone and when Jesus was in the vicinity he didn’t ask to be healed. It is Jesus who takes the initiative with the mud smearing. At this point the man is made uncomfortable and he experiences the helplessness of his situation. For the first time he faces his misery.

“I did not hide behind anger, outrage and self-pity anymore”

Back to my story. Once this window had been opened I had two choices. This is where the ball decidedly bounced on my side of the court. I could shut the window fast in horror or I could give a good look at what it was showing me. I chose the latter. I did not resort to more escapism. I did not hide behind more anger and outrage and self-pity. I looked almost dispassionately at what I was and what my life had become and I asked God to help me.

“I saw the things that were keeping me in chains”

I wish I could say I immediately felt better and everything became peachy or that I became a ‘good’ girl and was re-introduced within the community. None of this happened. What did happen was that God opened yet another window. If possible, the sight I saw within was more horrifying than the one in the first window. I saw the things that were keeping me in chains. With this realisation came the challenge to give up these things. So, the ball once again came thudding to my side of the court. Passive indeed!

“I realised that no recovery could be possible until I was in a safe place”

Our minds, formed by decades of legalistic preaching, will at this point think, “Ah yes this is where she had to give up drugs, sex and rock and roll. I had to give up sin, right? If only. This is why I say there is no hard and fast rule. Everyone will see different things in their windows. What is a common experience is that in order for my healing to happen, I have to leave behind what I see in the second window much like the still blind man had to leave the beloved corner where he used to sit and beg. I can close the window fast and make up a myriad of excuses, some of which might sound reasonable and even pious. I was tempted to do just that because for me it was loved ones. I had to give up toxic members of my family and some equally toxic friends. I was raised in a dysfunctional and abusive family and I realised that no recovery could be possible until I was in a safe place. At this point I had to decide to go ‘no contact’ with almost all the people I loved. If anything, from the outside I seemed to have become more sinful and corrupted but I was following the path that God was showing me. At this point I remembered Jesus saying that if your eye is an occasion to sin you have to gouge it out (Mt 18:9). That is how it felt.

“God will show us what action we need to take”

There is pain and there is damage. This step I took was infinitely painful but it stopped me from suffering further damage. Once God led me to this safety zone, He opened the third window. This window is not horrible like the previous two. It is the window of opportunity. If until now I was experiencing dying with Jesus, this third window was the window of resurrection (Rom 6). It is the pool of Siloam where the blind man finally is healed from his blindness and complacency.

In this window I saw not what I had to give up this time, but what I had to embrace. I saw the next step to my recovery. Taking these steps still required an effort and some courage so I guess it was easy to shut this window again. Again, since everyone is different, the action that God will show us which we need to take will also be different. For me it started as doing a 21 step program for recovery from child abuse, painting, writing poetry, working on a therapy called Dynamic Neural Retraining Program, starting to trust again and opening my heart to some amazing people, starting a Theology course at the Pastoral Formation Institute, starting a journey in Ignatian spirituality and the latest one is starting to write a book.

“I am not completely free and healed but I have flourished”

So is my life perfect now and am I completely free and healed after this spiritual conversion experience? No, I am not, but all areas of my life have flourished thanks to the loving care of Jesus. Sometimes I relapse a little into a past behaviour and the three windows open again one by one and I find my way back. What I can say now is that before I knew God because I had heard about Him, but now I know Him for what He has worked in my life experience and thus He has earned my trust.

Read more from Nuntia:
– Prayer: The Fear Of Abandonment
– “I Faced My Fear” – Facing The Fear Of Rejection
– Id, Ego and Superego Compared To The Three Characters In the Prodigal Son

The post A Slow, Genuine, Spiritual Conversion Experience appeared first on Universe of Faith.

This prayer poem describes the fear of abandonment and the relief found in the person of Jesus Christ. It was written during difficult times of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, a condition experienced by many survivors of child abuse.

In your punctured, swollen head
In your scourge-torn flesh
In the gaping holes of your hands and feet
but above all
In your lacerated side

I lay my fear of abandonment

The fear, fear, fear
Chasing me
in the foggy darkness
I run
sightless onward
breathless
I run
worshipping what I should love

I lay the void eating away at my soul
The hunger
For what will never be
The grief
The loss
The drip drip dripping of the silently bleeding heart

I lay the sadistic inner critic
ever going on and on and on
ever going on
The struggling, fragile self-esteem
The crumbling reflection in the mirror

I lay the flashbacks
The nightmares
The red-hot darts in my head
intrusive
obsessive
relentless

I lay the fatigue
the hopelessness
The strangling feeling of being trapped
forever

I lay the shame
The inadequacy
the wish to fade in the background and not be seen

I lay the crucified, Stockholmed love
which has no place here
but is nonetheless
the secret, tormented, yearning…

You see my love, my being is as tortured as yours.
I lay it all within your disfigured, beautiful body lying silently in the cold darkness
I lay myself now
I lay to rest near your silenced, broken heart
I will wait for the dawn.

Read more from Nuntia:
– A Slow, Genuine, Spiritual Conversion Experience
– “I Faced My Fear Of Being Unloved” – Facing The Fear Of Rejection
– Id, Ego and Superego Compared To The Three Characters In The Prodigal Son

The post Prayer for Fear of Abandonment appeared first on Universe of Faith.

“Be perfect therefore as your Father is perfect” (Mt 5;48) This verse has always confused me. Surely the expectation is a little (or very) unrealistic? It is no secret that humans tend towards selfishness. We are hard-wired to survive in a habitat that is not always friendly like all creatures in the animal kingdom so we are very focused on our own well-being. I believe that even altruistic people are motivated by what gives them satisfaction and that is neither a bad thing nor a good thing. It’s just the way we are.

The pleasure seeker and the respectable citizen

Some find satisfaction in the pursuit of personal pleasure. These people crave instant gratification and do not bother who they hurt in order to achieve it. These are the hedonistic libertines of our society. The more they have the more they want. On the extreme opposite pole there are those who are satisfied by obeying rules and being respectable citizens. These tend to be rigid and judgemental. These are the bigoted, perpetually resentful members of our society. These persons are still driven by what gives them satisfaction so they are also self-centered.

Id and Superego, the two brothers, found in every person

In Freud’s theory of the personality, these two opposing forces are found in every person. The self gratifying part of us is called the Id and it is always in conflict with the Superego that is the rule respecting, rigid version of us. If there is an imbalance between them one aspect will become dominant and the person in question will either become a libertine or a bigot. In the Parable of the Prodigal Son these two forces within us are vividly represented by the prodigal, debauched son and his prim, judgemental, obnoxious brother. These two brothers are both found within us.

Father Ego

According to Freud, there is then a third aspect of the human personality. It is the Ego (not to be confused with the common use of the word with its negative connotations related to pride). The Ego is the third part of the human personality which mediates between the Id and the Superego and incorporates them in a healthy way. The Ego allows the creative, questing force of the Id to flow but channels it through good sense and reason so that the individual’s safety and the rights of society are respected.

The mediator between the two brothers in the aforementioned parable is the Father. He is always in control. He is the perfect balance between tenderness and assertiveness. His motivation is not selfishness. He is driven by love. This is a detailed portrait of God the Father by the Man who knows Him best. It is what Jesus is proposing as a model when He tells us to be perfect like the Father.

Reconciling Id and Superego through Love

It is also a portrait of a healthy, human psyche which has a strong enough Ego that the conflict between the Superego and the Id, though ever ongoing, is mediated. The mediating factor is love. The love of God (see Pope Benedict’s letter God is Love, Part 1, Par 10) incorporates both the possessive, burning love called Eros which corresponds to the Id, and the dutiful, virtuous love called Philia which we may see as corresponding to the Superego. God seamlessly unifies these different forms of love through Agape which is divine, unconditional love. As the human being is led deeper into a reality of unity with God, his human limitations become transcended by the divine nature that he has inherited through the paschal mystery, saving the person from becoming either destructive (too ‘passionate’ that one destroys the other) or without life (only governed by duty).  As a result He gradually incorporates the human aspects of love previously governed by the Id and the Superego into a new reality transcended by Agape . This results in a healthier, holistic personality and the true fulfilment of human yearnings.

Read more from Nuntia:
– Prayer: The Fear Of Abandonment
– A Slow, Genuine, Spiritual Conversion Experience
– “I Faced My Fear” – Facing The Fear Of Rejection

The post Id Ego and Superego Compared to the Three Characters in the Prodigal Son appeared first on Universe of Faith.

When men lived and hunted in packs, actual physical death would result to an individual who was cut off from the rest of the pack. The limbic system (that part of the brain which regulates emotions) in modern man still unconsciously carries the fear of such a death.

The fear of losing our loved ones or those around us

As children we fear losing our parents, we fear being unloved. We unconsciously fear they might die or abandon us. We try our best to earn their approval and love. As we grow older, this need for approval and love extends to our peers and society in general. We work hard for it. We must have material goods, status, the right kind of lifestyle so that we are respected. We become fanatical about an ideology, a political party, a sports team or our religion. This makes us feel that we are a part of something. We fit in. We are safe. Deep within us we feel that if we don’t attain this we will die because we will be cut off from the pack. This gnawing fear also causes man to search for a means by which he can dull the fear. Hence the addictions, compulsions and all distractions with which our modern society is rife.

Jesus’ cut off from his social pack

We carry an existential death inside us throughout our lives. Jesus was cut off from the pack. He was crucified by his own people. Jesus physically entered man’s darkest, subconscious fear and he transformed it. Not only he transformed it through the resurrection but also being the God of life, being light itself, he introduced light and life in a place where there only used to be darkness and death.

Listening to our fears

We need to stop running away from the fear of rejection, this dark place. We need to stop trying to appease the fear. When we actually enter this place and stay with the fear of being rejected, the fear not being good enough, the fear of being a disappointment to our parents, our spouse, our children, the fear of being unloved and unworthy of love, the fear of being alone.in this place of desolation we can meet he who entered this place without needing to, he who entered this place for our sake. He went in it out of pure love for us so he could bring in light and life into our desolation. This place has been redeemed. So we no longer need to operate from its darkness. We do not need to spend our lives breathlessly running after the love and approval of others. We do not need to run away from the fear and the pain.

This is freedom. This is eternal life.

Read more from Nuntia:
– Prayer: The Fear Of Abandonment
– A Slow, Genuine, Spiritual Conversion Experience
– Id, Ego and Superego Compared To The Three Characters In The Prodigal Son

The post "I Faced my Fear of Being Unloved" – Facing the Fear of Rejection appeared first on Universe of Faith.